Monday, July 28, 2008

I'd Like a Little Cheese with this Whine.

Lets talk about running for a bit, shall we? I have made my share of mistakes in my training, and have paid the price for those mistakes this year. Started the year off with a fantastic race, followed by a friendly little stress fracture, once that healed, I have had a nagging little tendonitis inflammation problem that has caused a whole host of emotions, top of the list being anger. I've been angry when I see other runners training hard and looking strong. I've been angry when I've planned races and not been able to go. I've been angry when my training starts to pick up and my fitness starts to improve, and the nastiness strikes again. I've racked my brains, blamed it on compensation, muscle imbalances, shoes, yadda yadda yadda, but I'm sick of it really. It's quiet now, and hopefully gone. I've finally come to a more positive mindset, and feel quite a bit like this is really the end of this. It's embarrassing and humbling, frustrating and depressing. I really can't attach enough negative words to the struggles I've faced with returning to the runner I was, and hopefully beyond that. To have once been a strong, consistent runner, and now be the flailing, grasping, hurting runner is the most embarrassing thing I can imagine. I remember so many great runs, so many strong workouts, so much sweat and pain, and I want to be there again. I'm willing to take it slowly, but it's where I want to go - without hobbling.